Tag: Camp Magic

Top tips to cope with Father's Day

Top tips to cope with Father’s Day

Posted on | by Isabella Simantov

Father’s Day can be a difficult day for many children grieving the death of their dad or a significant male in their life.

Many people struggle to know what to say to a grieving child. It is through the fear of saying the wrong thing, they often say nothing at all, leaving the child feeling even more isolated and alone.

You may be wondering what the best way is to support grieving children during difficult times. The following tips may be useful this Father’s Day:

  1. Plan ahead

A reminder that Father’s Day is coming up is a helpful way to begin the conversation around what they want to do for it.

It is important to not assume you know what they will want. What they did last year might be exactly what they want to do again – or they might want to do something completely different. Similarly, some families may like to revisit old traditions, whereas others may like to invent something new for Father’s Day.

  • Provide Comfort

By simply taking the time to let a grieving child know that you are there and thinking of them, shows them that they are not alone this Father’s Day.

Grieving children often feel isolated from their friends and community. Others around them may not have experienced bereavement and loss like they have. They can feel detached and alone, especially on significant days like Father’s Day.

  • Consider different ways to express their feelings

If children don’t want to talk about their grief verbally, conversation and connection can be through drawing, craft, dance, poetry, play, images, and text messages.

Offer your child to write in a journal throughout the day. You might also want to offer your child a forum to connect with other family or friends who knew the loved one and share their memories of them

  • Listen

Father’s Day is an occasion that can bring powerful feelings to the surface. Some of these feelings might be isolation, anger, jealousy, and sadness. Some grieving kids might want to talk about their feelings, whilst others might try to express how they’re feeling through their behaviour.

It is important to listen to them and show them that what they are feeling is valid and completely normal. You might want to give your child ‘permission’ to not be okay, freeing them from expectations. Click here to read our blog on Managing Big Feelings this Father’s Day for more tips.

 We asked grieving kids from our Feel the Magic community to share what they would like their friends and family to say to them on Father’s Day. Here is what they said.

If you are supporting a bereaved child or know one, there is help available and a community that understands what you are going through.

Our mission at Feel the Magic is to ensure grieving kids, families, and their friends have the support and resources to help them feel and heal through their grief.

Our Grief Resource Hub has guides, activities, books, videos, and TED talks you may find helpful.

We have a range of face-to-face and virtual camps, so we can help grieving kids heal – no matter where they are.

If you would like to consider a donation this Father’s Day, please click here.

Father Day with Coby

“Father’s Day is a good day to me, I get to focus on Dad that day. Having him on my mind makes me feel better. In the lead-up to Father’s Day it can be scary, but on an actual day it’s usually really nice. I can feel him around me. I’m going to remember him by visiting a place in the Mountains we liked to go to. It’s a special place for us. To anyone else who has lost their dad, my advice is to use it as a way to dedicate a whole day to the person you love. Keep them on your mind and do things in memory of them.”

Koby, Camp Magic Camper.

Helping Children Navigate Their Grief

The Power of Reading: Helping Children Navigate Their Grief

Posted on | by Isabella Simantov

Grieving is a process that unfolds differently for every child and adult. Grieving children and teens might find it difficult to talk about their loss right away, and some may show signs of fear and need extra reassurance. 

Reading books about death and loss can help a child better understand what has happened and realise that they’re not alone.  

Some children might be ready to connect with books immediately after the death, others might be more ready in the weeks and months following the death. Either way, books can serve as tools to help children process their grief and feel less alone. 

Reading books can show grieving children characters who have experienced something similar. Books can also help children understand complex feelings, explain the facts and permanence of death, or even help children connect with memories of their lost loved one.  

Here are some tips for choosing helpful books and some recommendations for various age groups.

Books for children aged 4-7 years olds

Around this age, children begin to develop an understanding of death. Younger kids might feel responsible for the death of a loved one, or they might have magical thoughts that their behaviour could bring the person back. 

Tips for choosing helpful books for 4–7 year olds 

Look for books:

  • that help explain the basic facts about death 
  • in which characters feel multiple feelings simultaneously. Books can help kids understand that it is possible, and normal, to feel many things at once 
  • that show there is no “right way” to feel, grieve or express sadness or worry
Woman and child standing together smiling wearing blue Camp Magic tshirts
Mentor and Camper at Camp

Book recommendations

Books for children aged 8-12 years

Bereaved children within this age group generally understand that death is permanent. However, they might still have confused or magical thinking that something they could’ve done differently would have prevented the death. They might fixate on the details of their family member’s death.  

Man and child standing together smiling wearing blue Camp Magic tshirts
Mentor and Camper at Camp

Tips for choosing helpful books for 8–12 years

Look for books that:

  • feature characters that the child will see their own culture, family structures, and life experiences reflected.  
  • allow characters to express a range of emotions and behaviours after experiencing a loss. This is important to show children that there is no “right way” to process grief. 
  • are age-appropriate for individual children both in content and reading abilities.  

Book recommendations

Books for children aged 13-17 years

It is important to approach bereaved teenagers with compassion while maintaining boundaries. It is common for grief to manifest as anger in teens, and they might withdraw from school or act out in disruptive ways. Encourage them to find ways to express what they are feeling, and if they are willing to share with you, actively listen and validate the emotions being expressed.

Groups of teenagers in a room listening to speakers
Teenagers at Grad Camp

Tips for choosing helpful books for 13–17 years 

  • feature characters that the child will see their own culture, family structures, and life experiences reflected.   
  • allow characters to express a range of emotions and behaviours after experiencing a loss. This is important to show children that there is no “right way” to process grief.  
  • are age-appropriate for individual children both in content and reading abilities.    

Book recommendations

Some reflection questions

Reading can be used as a fun way to encourage young children and teenagers alike to talk about the death of their family member and their grief with a parent or other trusted adult.

We have compiled some questions you can give your child that will help them connect more with the book they’ve read and allow them to express feelings.

  1. It can be confusing to feel more than one feeling at once, like the character in the book we read. What are some feelings that a person may feel at the same time? Would you like to share anything about times when you have felt more than one feeling, such as feeling angry with someone and missing them, or feeling sad about something but happy at the same time?  
  1. What did the character feel after the loss? How did those feelings change over time?  
  1. It is hard to feel big feelings. How did the characters in the book feel? How do their feelings affect their behaviours? Have you noticed any ways that your feelings and behaviours are connected? Are there certain things that you do when you feel sad, angry, or confused?  
  1. What strategies did the character use to cope with their feelings? Which of the strategies seemed to be the most helpful for this character?  
  1. What would you like to say to the character experiencing grief? What things did other characters say or do that were the most helpful to the grieving character?  
  1. Would you like to talk about, write about, or draw any of your favourite memories of the person who died? Is there another way that you would like to remember or celebrate that person  
  1. How did the loss affect the character’s feelings of safety or security?  
  1. How did the character continue to feel connected to their loved one or to remember them after the death? How can you remember loved ones after they die? What can you do to stay connected to them and celebrate their memory?  

Helping children navigate grief through books allows them to feel connected with others, giving them the confidence to express difficult feelings like anxiety and anger. For more advice on how to help your child cope after a parent or other family member has died, visit our Grief Resource Hub.

Read More

Parenting Resources for Children and Teens

What to Say to a Child When a Parent Dies

A Guide on How to Teach Children About Death

Helpful Activities for Grieving Children and Teenagers

7 Helpful Activities for Grieving Children and Teenagers

Posted on | by Isabella Simantov

Coping with grief following the death of a loved one is particularly challenging and often confusing for children and teenagers.

Grieving children may feel numb and angry at the same time, while also dealing with both excess energy and exhaustion.

No two children or teens react to grief in the same way, but there are a variety of coping strategies, resources and activities to support children through their grief journey.

Activities may also be useful when supporting children and teens through anniversaries and significant events relating to a family member’s death.

Drawing of a tangled ball of grief

My Tangled Ball of Grief

A helpful grief activity for children is to create their own tangled ball of grief art. All you need is paper and either markers, crayons or coloured pencils.

Your child can create a key and then choose a different colour to represent each different emotion to then draw their own tangled ball of grief.

You can also use this art activity to talk with your child about what colours are most prominent, and why.

Six hand drawn hearts with white background

Thankful Hearts

Print this page and your child writes what they are thankful for on each heart. Younger children can draw what they are thankful for. Cut out the hearts and place them on the refrigerator, put them in a bowl, or keep them in your pockets. Read them together each morning as you begin your day. This activity is helpful for grieving children as it builds gratitude and appreciation.

A picture of a box with memories in it

Memory Box

A meaningful activity for grieving kids is to create a memory box.

You can use a shoebox or another box, decorate it and fill it with memorable items such as cards, drawings, personal items and photographs.

Your child may want to continue adding memories to the box as time goes by.

This is a great way to support children through the grief process by dedicating some time to fondly remember the person who has died.

Cardboard box with cardboard tube poking out of the top. On the front of the box are the words 'LET IT OUT!' written on the front.

Scream Box

When kids of any age are going through the grieving process, they will experience a range of emotions, including anger and frustration. Sometimes instead of wanting to talk, they may just feel like screaming.

This can be appealing to children and easily made with things you’ll likely have around the house.

Using an empty box, such as a cereal box, fill it with crumpled paper (e.g., paper towel, newspapers) and close the top of the box.

Using a paper towel tube, mark a circle on the top of the box and then cut out the hole.

Tape the paper towel tube to the hole and decorate the box. When you’re ready, scream into the box!

A small glass jar filled with different pieces of folded coloured paper

Jar of Memories

A meaningful activity for grieving children is to create a jar of happy memories.

Together with your child, write down your favourite memories of the special person who died.

Place the memories notes in a jar. Randomly take a memory out of the jar to remember the person.

It can also be helpful to read the memories out loud together.

An acrostic poem that reads Joyous Earthly Stunning Singer Interesting Caring Affectionate

Acrostic Poem

When a child has lost a family member, a healthy way for them to grieve and manage their emotions is to use creativity and art.  

By taking the name of their loved one who died, children are encouraged to reflect on the positive qualities of their loved one.  

  • Write down the person’s name vertically on the left side of a piece of paper. 
  • Write descriptive words using the first letter of the word. 
  • Encourage children to be creative and use colours, glitter and other crafts.  
A photo taken from above of someone creating beaded bracelets

Memory Bracelet

A meaningful activity for grieving children and teens is to create a memory bracelet to represent their loved one.

Using objects like beads and jewellery can be a good way for a child to tell a story about their loved one.

It is also something they can wear when they are missing their loved one. Different colours could represent different emotions, or memories, or anything else they wish to convey.

For more information about the bereavement programs, grief activities and support we offer to help grieving kids heal, click here.  

Read More

Connection Activities for Grieving Kids and Families

Grief-Related Kids Books, Movies and Novels

Parent and Guardian Grief Resources

Adult and child sitting on the floor talking

A Guide on How to Teach Children About Death

Posted on | by Isabella Simantov

Teaching children about death requires honesty and simple, age-appropriate information. 

Understanding your child’s knowledge and comprehension of death at different developmental stages is helpful when supporting your child through their grief. 

Understanding death at different ages 

Preschool-aged children mostly understand death as temporary and reversible. Children between the ages of five and nine begin to understand that all living things eventually die, however, they tend not to relate death to themselves.

Children at around the age of nine through to adolescence begin to fully understand that death is irreversible, and they too will die one day.  

Camper at Camp Magic learning grief strategies through activities
Campers at Camp Magic exploring their feelings

6 Ways to Teach Your Child about Death 

  • Take things slowly 

The first step when teaching a child about death is to have a firm grasp of their cognitive and emotional understanding of death. Use this information to guide you, as well as patience and persistence. 

Children process death gradually over time. Don’t sit them down once, overwhelm them with information and expect them to internalise it all immediately. 

Over a certain period, expect your child to ask various questions. Answer them consistently. As painful as it is, answer them honestly because it will help them start to grasp the finality of death.  

  • Be honest and clear 

Use simple, clear and direct words when teaching a child about death. It is also important to pause and give your child a moment to take in your words. Try to avoid euphemisms like, ‘She’s in a better place,’ because they can be scary and confusing for children. 

Use the word ‘death’ to avoid confusion. You could say “Your dad died. When people die their body stops working and you won’t be able to see them again”. If your child responds by asking whether the person’s body can be fixed, say “when a body stops working, it can never start again”. Click here to read the blog ‘What to Say to a Child When a Parent Dies’.  

  • Build Emotional Literacy 

By consistently labelling and modelling your own emotions, you are acting as an emotional role model for a child. Labelling some of your own feelings will make it easier for a child to share theirs. 

Another way to build emotional literacy is to use “feelings cards” or illustrations to introduce emotion vocabulary to children. Asking a child to describe what they are feeling is an important part of developing emotional literacy. If a child sees you cry, explain what you are feeling and why. An important part of teaching children about death is to show them that it is acceptable to cry and grieve. 

  • Explaining death and the body 

Consider your child’s age and maturity when helping them understand the physical aspect of death. Begin this part of the conversation by making sure the child understands that the body of the person who died does not work anymore and will never work again. 

Depending on your spiritual beliefs, you can also talk about what you and your family believe happens after death. An important part of teaching children about death is to try and make death a part of normal conversations with children. 

  • Explaining funerals 

An important part of teaching children about death is explaining funerals and memorial services. Clear descriptions of what will happen (e.g., religious symbols, casket, black clothing etc.) are helpful as children thrive on knowing what to expect. Remember, you don’t have to talk about everything at once. 

Explain the service in age-appropriate terms to help alleviate some of the anxiety that comes from not knowing what to expect. Let children know that they may feel a wide range of feelings as well, or they may not feel anything at all. Explain that sometimes our feelings come weeks or even months later.  

  • Children try to make sense of death by asking questions 

Teaching children about death often comes with questions about their own mortality and the death of others close to them. It is important to teach your child that some people only die when they are very old or very sick, but we will all die one day.  

Children may also wonder what happens when you die and how you answer this question depends on your personal or spiritual beliefs. Some children may find comfort in having something to focus on when thinking about a person who died, for example “when we see a star in the sky, we can think about Mum and how much she loved us”. However, avoid direct euphemisms which can confuse children (such as saying the stars in the sky are mum).   

For more support on how to teach children about death, read our guide How to teach children about death. 

If your family has experienced the death of a loved one, you and your child need to know that you are not alone. Feel the Magic support families through the difficult period following a death, and support children as they grieve the death of a loved one. Click here to find out more about our bereavement programs.  

Read More

What to Expect When Children Grieve 

Overcoming the Isolation of Grief: 7 to 9 years 

Overcoming the Isolation of Grief: 10 to 13 years 

Overcoming the Isolation of Grief: 14 to 17 years 

FTM Luke Camp Magic

Luke Parker Joins Feel the Magic as Proud Ambassador

Posted on | by Adam Blatch

Professional Australian rules footballer and Sydney Swans co-captain Luke Parker joins Feel the Magic as a proud Ambassador.

Luke is an accomplished footballer with impressive achievements. He has graciously pledged to support Feel the Magic and help us reach more families who need us.

We were fortunate to have Luke at a recent Camp Magic. He said, “For me, it’s about being able to give back in some way… and to be able to help where possible. I’m glad I’ve finally been able to come to camp and be a part of what it’s all about”.

Luke was inspired by the Campers’ resilience, the friendships and the bonds created.

“To come on board and be a part of the whole two-three days was something I will never forget. There were some sessions that were really moving…to build a bond with your Camper and see them grow and see them create friends and become really comfortable in the environment is something that was really inspiring.”

We are proud and immensely grateful to welcome Luke to our Feel the Magic community. Luke joins us to help raise awareness and funds to reach more grieving kids and families.

Adam Blatch, Chief Executive Officer Feel the Magic said “to have someone like Luke who is generous with his time to help us, help more kids, is a tremendous gift. His energy and commitment to give back is remarkable”.

“1 in 20 kids who have just lost a parent let alone a sibling who don’t know this is available or who are dealing with things on their own, I’d love just to help anyone I can to get them to Camp. The experience that I have had is 99% of the kids have gotten something from this camp and have all said they’d love to come back as well”. – Luke Parker

Follow Luke Parker here. For more information about Feel the Magic Camps, resources and research to help grieving kids heal, see our website and Grief Resource Hub.

About Feel the Magic Camps

We have a range of face-to-face and virtual Camps to help grieving kids face, feel and heal through their grief, no matter where they are.

All our Camps are run by trained mental health professionals and developed by clinical psychologists and people with a lived experience of grief.

At our Grief Resource Hub, you’ll find parent and guardian grief resources, connection activities for families, books, videos and TED talks, plus other grief support services.

Camper Mentor Group

Helping Kids Cope With Grief

Posted on | by Adam Blatch

He is one of Australia’s most respected positive psychology and parent speakers, an author and a researcher. He is the founder and owner of Happy Families Family Education.

Dr Justin Coulson invited Feel the Magic Co-Founder and National Virtual Program Lead, Kristy Thomas to his Happy Families podcast recently.

Many of us start the year with energy and feeling excited about life, but the reality is that sometimes hard things happen.

Episode #701: Kristy Thomas

During episode 701 of the Happy Families podcast – LISTEN HERE, Kristy shared the sad statistic that 1 in 20 children in Australia will lose a parent by the time they’re 18, what Feel the Magic is about and how best to support your grieving child.

Kristy also explained how:

  • grief can be isolating for children
  • Camp Magic can turn that feeling of isolation to inclusion amongst a community of other kids in similar situations
  • children usually respond to grief
  • parents should respond to their child’s grief
  • to feel it to heal it
  • to use your words intentionally
  • to look after yourself and your grief

Kristy said “Feel the Magic was born out of my own childhood bereavement as well as Co-Founder with my husband who had lost both his parents by the time he was 30. What we realised actually here in Australia is that there are minimal resources for children and parents to access to help kids through the worst time possible”.

Camp Magic – empowering kids to take control of their grief

Kristy further talked about Camp Magic, our signature and most in-demand three-day camp. We match every grieving child with an adult mentor that comes on the journey with them. They have someone sitting beside them on their journey. At every session during Camp, there is someone there with them to support them. We are there to empower kids to self-soothe, self-regulate, and take control of their grief.

“The biggest thing that’s amazing that comes along with these programs is they get to meet other kids like them. Part of what grief does to a kid is it isolates them. They become very different. They don’t know anyone else that is going through what they are. They don’t know how to talk about it with other people. And so when instantly they meet other kids going through the same thing, suddenly their world opens up to say I am not the only one. There’s a way forward” said Kristy.

Listen to the full podcast here, or on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify or iHeartRADIO.

About Feel the Magic

Kristy Thomas and her husband James founded Feel the Feel the Magic in 2013, driven by their personal experiences with grief and a mission to ensure no Australian child goes through grief alone.

We proudly continue this mission and have helped over 1,200 kids and their families through free camps, resources, research to help grieving kids heal.

As a leading charity dedicated exclusively to grieving children, we provide:

  • Evidence-based programs developed by a clinical psychologist
  • Free in-person and virtual camps for grieving kids
  • Grief support communities for teens, children and families
  • Free online resources and support

For more resources to help navigate childhood grief, please explore our Grief Resource Hub. If you’re interested in connecting your child and yourself to a community of people who understand you, and to mentors who can teach you about grief and give you the tools to heal, then please look into our free camps. If you need immediate mental health support for you or your child, please get in touch with a helpline.